The Intelligent, Compassionate Learning Community For Lesbians++
Welcoming all self-identified women and adjacent non-binary people who love women or want to.
Whether your heart is hurting or hoping,
we've got help for you.
Jen's Story:
From Disempowered To Empowered Lesbian Dating (And The Best Relationship Of Her Life)
Jen says, "I’ve been out for 30 years, and I’ve had 30 years of unconscious lesbian relationships, where either I’ve ignored red flags, or just done dating all the wrong ways, or been in relationships for way too long when I knew it was time to end them. And that won’t happen again. And the reason why it won’t happen again is because I found Conscious Girlfriend, and I’ve received a training and a map to be able to live out in the world and have lesbian relationships in a healthy, conscious way.”
Updated For 2024!
12 Weeks To The Love You Want.
If you've struggled to find the right partner, gone through heartbreak, felt unsure how to date, even wondered about giving up on love...
You need a Roadmap. And we've got one.
"I'm forever grateful to your class... since it led me to finding great love and connection. My partner and I just celebrated 4 years together!" – Mary G.
Do You Relate To Any Of These
Common Lesbian Challenges?
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Not knowing how to date, so you either stay single when you'd rather be in a relationship, or else go too fast into relationships.
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Still hurting from a breakup, and committed to keeping your heart safer in the future.
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Wondering if the right woman for you is even out there, or whether it's too late for you.
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Feeling like online dating doesn't work for you, yet not knowing how to find her.
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Not being sure you even want another relationship, yet missing deep connection.
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Committed to steering clear of unavailable women, but wondering if you can really trust your "picker."
If so, the Academy was made for you.
We'll help you get ready for the love you want,
and learn to find and be the right partner.
"This time, I choose to love with my full intelligence."
-- Adrienne Rich
What And Who Is The Academy?
About Academy Director
Ruth L. Schwartz, Ph.D.
Out as a lesbian since 1982, Ruth is the author of eight published books, including the Amazon bestseller Conscious Lesbian Dating & Love. She is passionate about learning, teaching and sharing the skills for happy lesbian relationships, and building nourishing, compassionate lesbian community.
About Our Amazon-Bestselling Book
Read the book that will teach you not just how to date, but how to choose the right partner and create the lasting love you dream of. Learn how to recognize and avoid the most common (and heartbreaking) mistakes most women-loving-women make, and exactly what to do instead.
About Our Community
World-class lesbian and queer faculty and coaches. A welcoming and age-diverse community of participants: lesbians, queer women, adjacent non-binary people and other women-loving-women from all over the U.S., Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, and elsewhere. Many members make deep friendships here. Some even find love!
About You
You are passionately motivated by the desire for a healthy, loving lesbian relationship. You are curious and interested in learning -- in fact, you may already be on a serious growth path. You've had plenty of lessons from the "school of hard knocks" and you're ready to find the roadmap to the life and love you want alongside compassionate lesbian/queer community!
Meet Some Of Our Members
As a late bloomer, Michelle came to the Academy for lesbian dating and relationship skills.
Michelle is a late-in-life lesbian who came out after a 23-year heterosexual marriage and raising three beautiful children. She says, "I've been dating my current partner for over a year now, and things are going very well. I attribute much of that to the skills I learned in the Conscious Girlfriend Academy."
Shayna has immersed herself in the Academy and also become a leader in the community.
"Now I'm happier than I've ever been," she says. "Conscious Girlfriend watered me like a plant. It fed me in ways I didn't even know I needed." Trained in spiritual direction and Conscious Girlfriend Academy coaching, Shayna now provides inspiration and leadership for our Conscious Lesbian Elders Support and Connection Group.
Frequently-Asked Questions
What kinds of women join the Academy?
- Members come from throughout the United States, as well as Canada, Europe, Mexico, Israel and elsewhere.
- Members range in age from their 20s through their 80s, but most are over 40.
- Some members are dating, or want to date; others aren't ready for a new relationship, but want more community and more skills.
- Many of our members have done a lot of personal growth work already; all are highly motivated to learn conscious lesbian dating and love skills.
- Some members are newly coming out; others have been out for decades, and everything in between.
- We are a warmly welcoming, intelligent and compassionate community for all self-identified women (and adjacent non-binary people) who love women, or want to!
How will a monthly or yearly Academy membership help me change my love life?
If you're like many of our members, you have a deep longing for a healthy, loving, trust-filled, supportive and passionate relationship, yet you're not sure how to find the right partner. In Academy classes you'll learn how to create a vision for your ideal relationship -- and build the skills to co-create your half of it. You'll learn how to date with clarity and confidence, how to recognize real compatibility (and not get fooled by chemistry or limerence, the "honeymoon stage"), how to communicate in ways that build emotional intimacy, and (if you choose) how to have fulfilling sex, too. Joining the Academy is like getting a gym membership for your romantic life! It gives you the community support and consistent education and practice you need, to become able to have the love life you want.
Can I just buy the classes I want, instead of joining the Academy?
Honestly, we used to sell a la carte classes, but we found it didn't give the same results. The Academy exists to help you gain and integrate the knowledge and skills to change your love life forever. That's an incredibly important and achievable goal, but it usually takes more than just watching a few classes to make it happen. It takes ongoing mentorship, support and practice -- and that's what you'll get by becoming a member.
We recommend joining the Academy for a year because 1) You get a big discount doing it that way. 2) Paying up front will motivate you to come to as many classes as you actually need, without having to second-guess yourself about each one. 3) Getting to know other members will be a big help in creating the love life you actually want. It's hard to do alone, and much easier when you're connected to like-minded women on similar journeys.
I've already done years of therapy and/or other personal growth work. How will the Academy be different?
Just like you, many of our members have done a lot of self-work -- yet it's rare for that work to specifically address the unique gifts and challenges of lesbian relationships. Therapy, 12-step, meditation, Landmark, and other kinds of growth and healing work are all incredibly valuable, yet lesbian dating and lesbian love requires certain highly specific understandings and skills which many people haven't found elsewhere -- and find in the Academy. Plus, along with mentorship and support, we offer opportunities to practice what you learn.
Do you offer private coaching?
Yes! We've got Conscious Girlfriend Certified Coaches! Check them out here. Academy Director Ruth Schwartz also offers a small number of coaching packages here. CGA coaches have received the world's best training in the particular challenges of lesbian coming out, lesbian dating, lesbian relationships, lesbian attachment, lesbian sex and lesbian breakups -- and their support is very powerful.
However, unless your money and time are unlimited, we strongly encourage you to join the Academy too. Our classes cover life-changing information in a more budget-friendly way. Classes and group coaching are a more efficient way to receive information, while getting the benefit of seeing and hearing like-minded women describe their journeys, ask questions, and receive group coaching.
Do you offer scholarships?
Yes! We are committed to financial accessibility and justice. Please check out our Scholarship Guidelines here and then email us at ruth@consciousgirlfriend to apply. Scholarships are available for Community-level membership, and for most of our classes. We aren't able to offer scholarships for Supporting-level memberships.
